It's easier to lie and be safe, time and time again i'm half stalled

private to sloane fawcett.

Sometimes I can't help but wonder what it would be like up there. I know I'm the only thing stopping me but...I've tried and I can't. No matter how amazing it would be. I'll always be the one behind the scenes, making the dreams come true.

/private.

I love touring, though I'm not enjoying all the portkey-ing about! It is worth it though to see Europe again. As you're all well aware The Bad Decisions are doing amazingly. Be jealous as I get to see them every night and every night I get to be amazed anew!

Megan's launch party last night was great even with the public speaking and everyone looked amazing.

private to megan jones.

You were wonderful the other night. I'm sorry about Roman, I will make sure that it does not happen again. I don't want to be the barer of bad news but it would appear that he is looking to make a come-back. He approached us around two months ago, I had hoped he would crawl back into the dark dismal place he came from. take the hint. bugger off. re-think his choice in career when he was told that he would not be returning to the label. It doesn't look that way though. If he contacts you in anyway just make sure we know and something will be done about it.

/private.

As I've found my camera I thought I would snap the newest addition to the Fawcett household.

His Grace, The Duke of Ankh, Commander Sir Samuel Vimes.


And this is Jaspers dog Casserole who I've adopted since he's off touring with Trist. It is unlike Jasp will be getting him back as Role is adorable and I love him. He's now house trained and very good at keepin' my feet toasty at night.

Hey, Banshees, tune in to the WWN about 7.

Oh, Decisions you can too I guess.



[If they had done so they would hear on Sloane's Mix tape: 'Before I hand you over to the diva who hosts the next show I want to give you all one last present. Ok, maybe two actually. Both of them are Mix Tape exclusive first plays, so you heard it here first ok? We have the very talented Banshees with their first single< insert song name! > and then the brand new single from The Very Hot Bad Decisions, especialy that Terry Boot, he's on fire! Enjoy them, I know I will. Night!'

She will then proceed to play one of the brand new songs from the Banshees debut album and the first single from The Bad Decisions new album.]

( PRIVATE TO BRIAN FAWCETT )

I'm pounding on the door,
my fists bloody raw
and i need you
oh, i need you
to let me in

do you remember the days
when you'd help me walk
when you'd tuck me in
those stories you used to weave

oh, i need you
i need you
to just let me in

alone, standing in silence
isn't how its meant to be
silent screams tore from my throat

do you remember the days
when we'd laugh and we'd cry
we'd play music into the night
i miss those days
two against the world
and nothing to fear

oh, i need you
i need you

---

fighting the tears
as your light bathes down on me
holding onto the unyielding fears
as i'm let a drift
i'm not ready
not ready
to hear you say
it's not ok

and i'm not ready (not ready )
to feel you slip away
my hands grasp onto the place you should be
and its all i can do to keep breathing

i watch as she wins
creeping in
closer everyday
and i cry as i realise
i can't fight her hold on you

---

Never thought I'd be the one in these shoes
Carrying you like I got nothing better to do
Isn't it meant to be the other way around?
The ground is giving way
Can't you see
your not the only one who needs help

This ain't the life I dreamed of
But the life I chose
So let me in
I need you to just let me in (let me in)

Walking alone with no where to call home
I find myself at your door
Closed and barred

---
Do really bad lyrics count as an entry?

The ministry has been moaning about the lack of updates. Apparently I'm not supposed to be busy with things, I'm not supposed to be acting like an adult and getting on with my job and my life. Instead I should be worrying about the war and all the repercussions that comes with it, wallowing in the past. I'm kind of tired of that though. Every time I look at this journal it reminds me of everything which happened, all the pain we suffered and everything which came with it and yet they want us to move on.

Anyway. Banshees I've scheduled some studio time for you in the up coming week, we also need to talk album art.

Mandy, thanks for the other night. I had a great night.

Remind me to never, ever, ever dog-sit again. Or to get a dog to be honest. I have enough work with the bloody bands.

Don't much like the thought of mandatory journals but fine. I'm more worried about how much work may be caused by them. Music types have a tendency to mouth off.

Nice bit of work when into them. Mines dark purple with music notes on the front, the paper has very faint music scores on, perfect to be honest.

{ A failed attempt at creating a private entry }
I used to get lost in your eyes and it seems that I can't live a day without you
Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away
To a place where I am blinded by the light but it's not right

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
Ooh

And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time
I want what's yours and I want what's mine
I want you but I'm not giving in this time
{/ A failed attempt at creating a private entry }